OT job I am losing my cool
R K.
on 2/22/11 7:32 am, edited 2/22/11 7:33 am
on 2/22/11 7:32 am, edited 2/22/11 7:33 am
Well now that you know that she is fickle just don't wear jeans. I don't know what type of therapist you are but jeans probably aren't therapist appropriate anyway. Somehow America seemed to get away from professional attire. I especially hate it when I walk through a high school and can't tell teachers from students.
Quit letting other people dictate your emotions. It's just work. It's a place you go to earn a living. You need to give your profession 100% while there but I promise if you ever quit or move away your memory will slowly fade and most of the relationships will disappear.
Harsh, nope just the way it is.
Don't envy people that work in solitude, I've been there done that. In the end nobody works in a vacuum.
Quit letting other people dictate your emotions. It's just work. It's a place you go to earn a living. You need to give your profession 100% while there but I promise if you ever quit or move away your memory will slowly fade and most of the relationships will disappear.
Harsh, nope just the way it is.
Don't envy people that work in solitude, I've been there done that. In the end nobody works in a vacuum.
*
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
— Randy Pausch
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
— Randy Pausch
I came here for support from my FRIENDS those who know me, and the situation at large and not just a snap shot. Whether you feel the jeans are appropriate and the dress code of America's working population is lacking is really of no consequence to me. I am not new to the working world and have weathered some pretty awful jobs. The reason this is so upsetting to me is because I thought i had finally found a job that I was good at, got recognized for and had good working relationships. The reality appears to be you cannot trust your boss ever. So while I am sure you are trying to provide me with tough love, I really could do without it today.
R K.
on 2/22/11 8:21 am
on 2/22/11 8:21 am
It's not tough love it's just somebody that is not too close to the situation that can have sometimes a more objective opinion.
You probably are good at your job. You are also probably very young. You'll learn that even under the best work situations people are fickle, selfish and deceitful. That doesn't mean everybody but sadly these days it's a vast majority.
Middle level management can be the worst to deal with.
In the end don't look to your coworkers or boss for validation. Look at the actual fruits of your labor and you'll be much happier.
I chose a solitary job for the vast majority of my working life so I wouldn't have to deal with politics on a daily basis but it's a trade off that's not much better.
You probably are good at your job. You are also probably very young. You'll learn that even under the best work situations people are fickle, selfish and deceitful. That doesn't mean everybody but sadly these days it's a vast majority.
Middle level management can be the worst to deal with.
In the end don't look to your coworkers or boss for validation. Look at the actual fruits of your labor and you'll be much happier.
I chose a solitary job for the vast majority of my working life so I wouldn't have to deal with politics on a daily basis but it's a trade off that's not much better.
*
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
— Randy Pausch
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
— Randy Pausch
Dude,
This board is support, the key word is SUPPORT!! You may be telling it "like it is", but Nicole is a dear friend of mine and I for one WILL support her no matter what!! Making her feel worse was not a "postable" option, just sayin!
Nicole, Love you girl!!
Beth
This board is support, the key word is SUPPORT!! You may be telling it "like it is", but Nicole is a dear friend of mine and I for one WILL support her no matter what!! Making her feel worse was not a "postable" option, just sayin!
Nicole, Love you girl!!
Beth
http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wvHjqcu/">
http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/t/wvHjqcu/weight.png">>
Roger...Nicole is very good at her job. Why would you assume she was "very young"? Not very smart to make assumptions like that.
Nic...sorry you had a crappy day. Most of us have been there bad feel for you, love you, and are here for you. And yeah...rebuttal is the way to go. Love you girl!! I can let loose on them with my hormonally pregnant self anytime you want me to!! LOL
Nic...sorry you had a crappy day. Most of us have been there bad feel for you, love you, and are here for you. And yeah...rebuttal is the way to go. Love you girl!! I can let loose on them with my hormonally pregnant self anytime you want me to!! LOL
Lisa H.
Nic,
I agree with Laureen and it sounds like your actions are sound and are focused on cutting out the emotion. While it may not have any result in changing the review, you will have stood up for yourself, which is important. As a manager of people for many years, I can say I probably would not have changed a rating based on a response from an employee, but would have absolutely respected an employee that wanted to better understand my perspective and come to a mutual agreement about what would change that opinion.
I hope that the rebuttal is met by a receptive ear.
Love ya,
Maura
I agree with Laureen and it sounds like your actions are sound and are focused on cutting out the emotion. While it may not have any result in changing the review, you will have stood up for yourself, which is important. As a manager of people for many years, I can say I probably would not have changed a rating based on a response from an employee, but would have absolutely respected an employee that wanted to better understand my perspective and come to a mutual agreement about what would change that opinion.
I hope that the rebuttal is met by a receptive ear.
Love ya,
Maura
Maura
Maura I don't really need them to change it. What I need for them to get is that the review itself was poorly written and inacurate. It is more of a reflection on them then me. the main issue is that my job needs more role definition to be able to avoid these misunderstandings in the future, and my manager needs to do a better job of letting me know what she needs througout the year and not on my review. And really how can I fix being " making her look bad" when she is gone by doing her job too well?? I mean really. I am currently finishing it up, and have had a few people look at this. The fact that i want to work this out is why I am doing this to and putting myself out there. In the past I would shut down and start looking for another job.
Jumping in late here to say that I hope tomorrow is a better day. Sometimes there's nowhere to go but UP.
I don't think the issue is really about jeans. It seems to me like that was just "one more thing to pile on" for some reason.
Several years back I had a less than flattering performance review and I am not sure I ever got over it. That boss has retired and moved on - and even had the audacity to send us Christmas cards for several years, which I never reciprocated - but the situation feels like yesterday. I did write a rebuttal and spent considerable time with it. Yes, have someone else read it over, and yes, keep it "just the facts." (Speaking of audacity, that same boss put the moves on my husband at a work event, but that's another story.)
But the bigger question in my mind for you is how do you get past this rough patch. Try to take the high road - square your shoulders and be the uber professional, and allow yourself to channel that anger into a more positive place that way, at least while at work.
Years ago, I worked with a school social worker who, on particularly stressful days, would come to me and simply say as a little mantra, "I am thankful for employment." Try that...see if it helps.
Keep us posted as to how it's going. Take care...just get through the week.
I don't think the issue is really about jeans. It seems to me like that was just "one more thing to pile on" for some reason.
Several years back I had a less than flattering performance review and I am not sure I ever got over it. That boss has retired and moved on - and even had the audacity to send us Christmas cards for several years, which I never reciprocated - but the situation feels like yesterday. I did write a rebuttal and spent considerable time with it. Yes, have someone else read it over, and yes, keep it "just the facts." (Speaking of audacity, that same boss put the moves on my husband at a work event, but that's another story.)
But the bigger question in my mind for you is how do you get past this rough patch. Try to take the high road - square your shoulders and be the uber professional, and allow yourself to channel that anger into a more positive place that way, at least while at work.
Years ago, I worked with a school social worker who, on particularly stressful days, would come to me and simply say as a little mantra, "I am thankful for employment." Try that...see if it helps.
Keep us posted as to how it's going. Take care...just get through the week.
Most Active
Recent Topics
